Collapse of the Liber Ale Brewery

The Collapse of the Liber Ale Brewery in Oz.

collapse of the liber ale brewery-1

The Liber Ale Brewery, founded in 1944, has been a part of the Oz landscape for nearly 79 years.

Liber Ale purchased a controlling interest in the National Draught Ale Brewery in 1949, but the two breweries continued to operate independently. Every four years, they join forces and release an anniversary brand called “The Coalition.”

The Liber Ale Brewery began dying their beer blue in 1982 in order to attract blue collar workers. Although this worked somewhat, the majority of Liber Ale drinkers are from the middle and upper classes.

Not to be outdone, the CEO of the Red Lab Lager Brewery began dying theirs red as soon as he heard the news, although why he selected red is still unknown.

In 1990, the National Draught Ale Brewery began dying their beer yellow in order to support Oz athletes at the Commonwealth Games. This worked very well for the brand, and it would later become extremely popular in rural areas.

A mix-up occurred in 1992 at the Braddon Brewery in the ACT, resulting in batches of blue and yellow dye becoming mixed in a vat and going unnoticed. This resulted in a putrid looking green beer. Unfortunately, hundreds of barrels were shipped out before anyone knew what was going on. Their phone lines were soon flooded with complaints from people who had tried this green batch; it tasted horrible, it left people feeling dazed and confused and without notice, those affected would start walking around in circles chanting, “No Nuclear, No Coal, No Gas, Sun is good, Wind is good.”

For the general public, this was a terrifying situation, but the effects wore off after 2 hours. Despite the fact that the majority of these barrels were reclaimed and destroyed, the owner of a microbrewery in Braddon, ACT, loved the taste of the green goo and decided to recreate this brew and start selling it outside of university campuses across the country. This brew was named The Happy Green, but it was never popular, and they were never able to improve the taste or eliminate the horrid side effects.

If you ever accidentally consume the green goo known as ‘The Happy Green’ stay calm but keep in mind that you only have 25 minutes before the side effects begin.   You will need to get yourself to your nearest publican or bottle shop attendant as soon as possible to receive beer replacement therapy.   On the way there, do not embarrass yourself by talking to anyone about base-load power supply and don’t go joining any strange anti-everything cults.

What went wrong with the Liber Ale Brewery?

liber ale exec goes crazy

The worst thing that ever happened was when the CEO of Liber Ale was clearly drunk one Friday afternoon and made a video recording of himself saying that climate change is not real, the world is fine and that there is nothing wrong with the environment.

He then got one of his mates to record him running around his backyard singing, “I’m a climate skeptic, short and stout, this is my handle, this is my spout.” When it comes to the environment, I yell out, “It’s all silly, cut it out!”

Both video recordings were uploaded to social media platforms and went viral.  Obviously, this behaviour did not sit well with the people of Oz, and many people stopped drinking Liber Ale in protest. Most people switched to Red Lab Lager, and some even forced themselves to drink the revolting Happy Green beer. The general public then turned their attention to the Liber Ale Brewery and began poring over their records with laser-like focus.   They would discover numerous instances of misappropriation of funds, inappropriate office behaviour, and numerous other ethically questionable actions.

To save the company, Liber Ale executives decided to experiment with different coloured beers, releasing several brews with a greenish tinge to try to attract younger audiences. None of their reactionary efforts to save the brewery were successful, and the once prosperous brewery was placed into receivership.

Liber Ale Executives were behaving badly for many years.

court hearing liber ale-1

On Saturday, May 21, 2022, the creditor’s petition hearing took 4 days to read out all of the financial and behavioral transgressions associated with the company’s unfortunate demise.

Over the last 78 years Liber Ale’s CEOs, CFOs, Imports Managers, Pension Scheme Managers, Regional Managers, Human Resource Managers, Advertising Managers, and External Affairs Managers appeared to have forgotten that they do not own the company; the shareholders do.

1,712 instances of executives using company money that should have went to shareholders for non-company purposes were read out to the shock of all those in court.

In 306 cases, bad-behaving Liber Ale executives should have been fired or asked to resign in accordance with company policy. 

Alan Brarnt, the inquiry’s chief investigator, claimed that Liber Ale CEOs should have been fired by the board on 28 occasions, prompting the enquiry to investigate graft and corruption among board members.

The investigative team discovered expense claims totaling $AUD 156 million dollars for environmental improvements at the Liber Ale Buildings and surrounding areas, but there was no evidence of any activity when a team of environmental engineers was tasked with assessing these claims.   There have been claims that the majority, if not all, of this money was given to companies that regularly harm the environment in order to promote beer sales in these communities.

Liber Ale executives claim that all breweries face the same problems.

criminals behaving badly-1

During questioning under oath, many Liber Ale executives stated that they did not believe they were doing anything wrong because their friends in senior management positions at the Red Lab Lager Brewing Company were doing the same thing.

Many of those called to testify claimed that there was a long list of Red Lab Lager executives who should be investigated for corruption and that the nepotism and cronyism they are getting away with is standard operating procedure at their company.

Unauthorized Sales of company assets and land.

The enquiry uncovered 93 instances in which Liber Ale property was sold without the approval of the board and then rented back to Liber Ale at exorbitant weekly rates. This was revealed to be one of the major reasons for the financial demise of Liber Ale.

A separate investigation is looking into how all company housing was sold off, bought by Liber Ale Executives, and then rented to the same employees at twice the previous rate.

Again, the most common argument heard by those questioned in these cases is that it cannot be illegal if nearly all of the Red Lab Lager executives are doing the same thing. They all claimed that no company wants to provide low-cost housing for employees anymore, so what’s the big deal?

Investing Liber Ale R&D funds in schemes run by executives' friends.

Investing company money

The Brewing Sector’s Anti-Corruption Unit was looking into AUD $68 million in donations to the Pie in the Sky Power Company and Verbally Powered Vehicles Ltd, which are now being traced back to Liber Ale executives.  

The problem identified is that these companies are partially owned by the same Liber Ale Executives that were claiming refund of these donations under the Brewing Sector Regional Development Program.

The Pie in the Sky Power Company (Sky Power).

The Pie in the Sky Power Company, also known as Sky Power, is a Canberra-based startup that is majority owned by Lime Green Trustees. Sky Power claims to have developed technology that will allow Oz to be powered by renewable energy 24 hours a day, seven days a week. 

Their patented Prayers, Wishes, Hugs, and Kisses technology has gotten a lot of attention in the last 10 months, and if it takes off like some analysts predict, the Liber Ale Executives who are financially involved could stand to make billions of dollars.   

The market for keeping the lights on at night/PM generation in Oz is wide open because the country is unwilling to invest in advanced nuclear technology, natural gas-fueled power plants or HELE coal fired plants.

Verbally Powered Vehicles Ltd (VPV).

Oz has around 9 thousand politicians being paid by tax and/or rate payers to the tune of AUD $1.9 Billion dollars per year at the 3 level of government.   Hardly any of them ever seem overly interested in doing anything for the environment.   

So with that in mind, the team at VPV set about coming up with a way to get all of these politicians involved.

Over the last ten years, the VPV team has been closely monitoring technological advancements in the production of bio-gas from thermal hydrolysis and anaerobic digestion (poop to power plants).

They had also been monitoring the amount of excrement that politicians verbally excreted when asked to provide a Yes or No response to a very direct question, especially when the question relates to the environment.

Scientists at VPV believed they could build a micro poop-to-power plant inside a standard-sized vehicle.   They also had a rather good idea for devising a method of supplying that power plant with a constant supply of excrement/fecal matter.  

It took a long time and a lot of money, but they eventually succeeded in creating a working model of what they called The Verbally Powered Vehicle.

They would discover that the secret to success was to develop a ‘Key On Questions On’ technology as follows:

1.     When the key in the ignition is turned to the on position, the fuel catching mask automatically lowers and attaches itself to the drivers face.

2.    The vehicles sound system starts playing pre-recorded direct questions asked by radio and TV presenters to politicians over the last 25 years on a loop.  

3.    The drivers will be unable to resist rattling off hundreds of excrement producing comments that have got nothing to do with the questions being played.   Their verbally expelled excrement soon begins to fill the fuel collection mask and supply the power plant.

4.    There is a 30 second vehicle warm up process before maximum power is obtained and the gearbox can be engaged.

The first fully functioning prototype from Verbally Powered Vehicles Ltd rolled out of their Canberra-based test facility in 2019.   For the past four years they have been trialing VPVs with various government employees with very positive results.

VPV is also testing a vehicle that is not powered by a politician. They studied thousands of responses received by Police officers from drivers when they were asked, “Why were you speeding”.   This one question provided encouraging amounts of excrement every time it was asked.

With potential sales of over 10,000 per year and a base price of $100,000 per vehicle, the financial links back to Liber Ale executives are naturally being investigated.

Filling the hole left in the Oz beer market.

oz beer market-1

On a hot day, Ozzies enjoy nothing more than an ice cold beer and typically they are quite partial to drinking beer on any day that ends with the letter Y.   With that in mind, this is a very worthwhile market and one that is hotly contested.  

Unfortunately, not all Ozzies have adjusted to the taste of Red Lab Lager since the collapse of the Liber Ale Brewing Company.

Even after 10 months and numerous attempts, many Ozzies claim that they are unable to tolerate the taste of the red-colored Ale and there’s zero chance of them ever being interested in tasting The Happy Green.

Red Lab Lager tested the market with a blue-ish red brew as well as a Teal-colored pilsner in 2023.   Both attempts received less than a 5% satisfaction rate, with most people calling these brews “laughable.”

They even tried releasing a new reddish-green brew, which had very strong initial results.   However, when consumers began reading the label and discovered how this brew was made, they abandoned all interest in it.

It was not all bad news in 2023 though, there has recently been some good news in this space. 

Peta's Unique Tasting Beer

The Liber Ale Brewery

A Victorian microbrewery called Peta’s Unique Tasting Beer, rose from obscurity on March 3, 2023, when CEO Peta Herheadisonright was discussing her brew on a popular AM radio program.

Peta and her company have perfected the blue colouring process of beer and developed a new flavour that even consumers who have only drank Red Lab Lager their entire adult lives are now raving about.

Peta is also a popular storyteller on national television, and many people are hoping she will give up her TV career to take her unique tasting brew to the top of the Oz beer market.

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